Yesterday was National Hot Dog Day, but I’m sure this isn’t news to you.
I mean, it seems like they start pumping those Hot Dog Day songs through the speakers down at the drugstore earlier every year. Families all over the country have hung decorative buns from their mantles with care, and all the news pundits on TV won’t shut up about the liberal “War on Hot Dog Day”. You’d have to be in a coma not to know that yesterday, July 23rd, was National Hot Dog Day.
But, for those of you who have recently awoken from a deathlike slumber. Welcome back!
Superhero movies are huge now, our phones are actually computers and you can order pizza online.
And, in case I haven’t made it clear, its National F-ing Hot Dog day.
It reminds me of the hot dog eating contest I halfheartedly watched on ESPN a few weeks ago while wishing for college football season to start. It seemed like the majority of the hour plus allotted to the event was taken up by big, theatrical entrances in which the often doughy and sometimes Asian participants (athletes?) walked to the stage amid the sparse applause and assorted hoops of the assembled hipsters on Coney Island to a song of their choosing. Journey seemed to be a popular choice, or maybe I just imagined it was. Anyway, it was pretty great to watch.
Such a display of excess. The eaters grimace in obvious discomfort as they shovel food into their gullets and try not to puke. I’m not even going to make the boring connection to the ham-fisted metaphor of it all, the way such a contest symbolizes a societal wealth and Romanesque overindulgence. It’s more than a little like a Nascar race when you think about it, from the hyper consumption of resources to the quote-unquote athletes with their own entrance music. I’m not gonna do that, so don’t ask me to.
I guess it all comes down to a question, as these Question of the Day posts so often do.
That thing I said before about the guys in the hot dog contest being ‘often doughy and sometimes Asian’; was that racist, or just hilarious?
Also, when is such excess justified? I just might argue that for a contest on July 4th on Coney Island, when Joey Chestnut ate substantially more Nathan’s Hot Dogs than any of the other contestants on the dais that day, it was.
Or maybe I’m just hungry.