The Poetry Question

Discovering the Relevance of Words

REVIEW: JEFFERY HECKER – INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE ORGY

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I’ve admittedly never been to an orgy, so when I received this book in the mail, it tickled my interest. I figured it couldn’t hurt to know what to do if one should ever present itself, and at least this would give me a hint on what my role would be, depending of course upon the order in which I arrive at said orgy.

Unfortunately, I don’t totally understand what’s going on in Jeffery Hecker’s Instructions For The OrgyI’ve read it several times now, trying to pick up on the intricate details, but much like a guide to putting together a car motor, I’m not following this one either.

I actually like the way it’s written. I think it’s incredibly witty, but that’s not enough to actually understand it. For example:

Instructions for the Third to the Orgy

Did you ensure my Dominatrix’s Cobra Insurance

hatched my wife out of her full-body cast?

What do you mean she confessed to the waiting room

she couldn’t feel her genitals?

The nurse cited a medical journal study declaring no feeling’s normal?

She asked the nurse, “What do you think?”

Did the nurse really respond, “I don’t think it’s normal”?

 

I laughed when I read it. I can see the conversation taking place, and it’s funny, but what about this:

Instructions for the Second to the Orgy

See the Radio Flyer Big Girls Big Flyer

pink tricycle parts beside the adult cars?

Assembly required.

Pedal past the motion sensor. If you’re too obese,

push it. O, Canada

geese think my yard is

Mecca. Feed the beaks.

No bird seed, huh? They accept trash.

See the R.H. Mayland handbell?

Feel the clapper’s felt pad.

Gentle bossa nova triggers the garage door,

burglar reverse psychology.

You’ll never get in that way, trust me.

Give the handbell hell as if you’re on fire.

Cry “I’m on Fiyah!”

Blow the golden calf grazing behind you.

 

I mean, I get the “garage door” reference, and the “burglar reverse psychology” line. The handbell seems obvious. But geese? R.H. Mayland? I looked that one up to try to gather something, but I’m at a big loss there.

If these are my instructions for an orgy – even sarcastic, or sardonic, or witty – they aren’t helping me at all. Maybe I’m just lost. Maybe someone else needs to explain it to me. Maybe that will make me feel silly or stupid for not picking up on what Hecker is putting down. If that’s the case, then fine. But right now I feel like the ninth person to show up to the orgy, and I’m at the “house houses down” from where I should be.

 

If you’re curious, and I have a feeling you are, then grab your copy of Jeffery Hecker’s Instructions for the Orgy, at the Sunnyoutside website.

About Christopher Margolin

Chris Margolin spent more than a decade in Education as a high school English teacher, and is now an Instructional Coach for the Longview School District. He is also the founder of The Poetry Question, an online journal which focuses on reviews of small press poetry publications, and runs a regular series called "The Power of Poetry," where notable poets share their personal stories of how poetry has affected their lives. Margolin resides in Vancouver, Washington with his wife, and daughter.

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